Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Happy Valentine's Day

Today is the day that America has set aside to "express" the word love in many ways. No matter how you handle today, just make sure you love real and tell people that you love, that you love them and mean it. Three simple but powerful words. 

Happy Valentine's Day to all of you and I love each and every one of you. I thank you for the support and love over the years. 

Wednesday, February 7, 2018

Scheduling Sex with your Spouse

What's that? You didn't know that this existed? Well, it does.

Life is SO BUSY and sometimes you might just forget about having sex with your spouse. Yes, it can happen. Typical day outline: 

5:30 am - Wake up to prepare for your day 
5:35 am - Meditation 
5:45 am - Get the kids up to get them ready for school 
6:30 am - Get yourself ready for work 
7:10 am - Load everyone in the car
7:30 am - drop kids off at school 
8:30 am - You get to work 
8:35 am - You get a text message that your son left his lunch and you have to send money electronically so he can eat lunch. 
9:15 am - urgent email comes across your screen informing you that you had a deadline of today on an assignment. 
12:30 pm - You go to lunch 
1:30 pm - you go back to work 
3:48 pm - you turn in your assignment 
3:49 pm - you take a deep sigh 
3:50 pm - you start to wonder what's for dinner 
4:30 pm - you clock out of work 
4:45 pm - you get to the interstate only to find out there is an accident up further from you and traffic is bumper to bumper
4:46 pm - you call your spouse to see if he can pick the kids up but he reminds you that it was the night for him to work late and you forgot 
4:52 pm - you call the after school care to let them know you are going to be late because of traffic 
5:00 pm - traffic starts to move but you are still running behind
5:30 pm - traffic is still bumper to bumper moving slow but it's moving 
6:00 pm - you are now 15 minutes out from the afterschool
6:01 pm - you are now thinking about the late fee you will have to pay (double might I add) 
6:17 pm - you pull up to the afterschool and get the kids 
6:35 pm - you load the kids in the car 
7:20 pm - you pull up at home 
7:35 pm - you go to the kitchen and get something out to cook
7:36 pm - you are talking to the kids and helping with homework while cooking 
8:30 pm - you sit the kids down to eat dinner 
8:32 pm - hubby walks in the door from work 
8:37 pm - hubby sits at the dinner table 
9:10 pm - you take the kids to the bathroom to get them ready to go to bed 
9:40 pm - you put the kids in the bed and kiss them goodnight 
10:00 pm - you go back to the kitchen to clean up 
10:45 pm - you are dragging yourself to the bedroom 
11:20 pm - you are OUT LIKE A LIGHT

...and you start it all back over in just a few hours. 

Now, it can vary depending on how the day starts, go, and end. But you notice that in that timeline it was not much communication or time spent with the spouse? And it was on both ends, not just one. So that comes to my question.

Is it a bad thing to schedule sex with your spouse? 

Some may so no. Some may say yes. I say IT'S NOT! If it has been a long time since you and your spouse have been intimate with each other due to your busy schedule, then you might need to add that to your schedule. This is not stupid tactic because overwhelming is real and life with responsibilities is real. So don't think that this can't happen, because guess what, it can.  Have my husband and I had to schedule time for each other physically, that answer will be YES! 

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy and Jill a tired girl.

So let's not be like Jack and Jill and get some more spunk into both of your lives and make your marriage work again. 

How to set up the "appointment". 

1) Go to your calendar and pick a day that you and he don't have anything to do but be at home. Schedule a babysitter (if needed), and add it to the calendar. 

2) Send an invite to him to add to his calendar. 

3) Set up reminders on your phone. 

4) Make sure NOTHING is scheduled or will be SCHEDULED for that evening. 

5) Make the best of it! 

Do not be embarrassed by this because it happens to us all. It's called LIFE. You have to do what's best for you and your husband. 

Thursday, February 1, 2018

February Marriage Prayer

Say this prayer alone or with your spouse. A family that prays together, stays together. 

February (A Prayer of Love) 

Dear Heavenly Father.  Thank You, for allowing us to see the first day of a new month.  This month is dedicated to Love.  God, we know that You are the Epitome of Love. Teach me how to love You more, myself, my spouse, and my children. Teach us how to love each other, again. Teach us how to accept the wrong but not have ill feelings towards one another. Teach us how to not let the love waver. Keep us both in our right mind to stay positive and to be able to accept it, in love. Instill in me real love so that when others see me, they will see You. 

In Jesus' name, I pray, Amen. 

Friday, January 26, 2018

Happy National Spouses Day

You've never heard of this? Wait, me either but hey it's fun though! Today is #NationalSpousesDay.  Is this an official holiday? No. BUT, if you're married, you can make it an official holiday. 

This day is set aside to recognize all of the happily married couples all over. Every day is spouse day as long as you are still I think this is fun and cute. Recognizing your spouse for America to see it is great. Thank you, America for this day because I thought that you were against marriages.  The divorce rate is so high and a lot of people don't respect marriages anymore because society has looked down on them. 

Now, every day should be happy spouses day. But America, made this day a little extra special for all the spouses. 

5 Things you both can do to recognize today: 

5) Send each other cute reminders of fun things done within the marriage. This will put the spark back into the both of your eyes and you will fall in love all over again. 
4) Text each other 5 selfie pictures of you both together. Reminiscing about what took place when that pic was taken. 
3) Send a simple I love you text. While at work, things can be and get a little hectic. 
2) Share your favorite pic of each other on social media and tag them in it! 
1) Send a "can't wait to see you later" message. The heart does ponder about things to come. Make it extra special. 

Here's a photo of me and my spouse! 

Enjoy today and all the days to come! 

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

January Marriage Prayer

Say this prayer with your spouse to bring you closer to God and each other! 

January (Prayer for A New Bond in the Marriage)

Dear Lord. It's a new year and we thank You for allowing us to see it. We want a new refreshing over our lives and our marriage. You are the Foundation of our marriage. Bring us together as one, again. Last year taught us both valuable lessons that we never want to face again. Thank You for bringing us to this point.  Thank You in advance for taking us to the next level to be better. As You said in Your Word that You will never leave us nor forsake us. 

In Jesus' name, Amen.

What is the Role of A Wife?

"Wives, submit yourself unto YOUR own husbands, as unto the Lord."   Ephesians 5:22 

Marriage and life have changed over the years since our grandparents first got married. It has been said that the wives back then didn't mind, being at home and taking good care of the home and the husband. Well, things are a little different today.  Social changes, finances, and life all brought about a change to what the wife role is in the marriage. It's not a "keeping up with the Jones or Kardashians" type matter. It's just keeping it flow for what works for the both of you.

Now the only manual I can think of that can tell you how to be a wife and what marriage truly is, is the Bible.  That is the blueprint for what God wanted marriage to be.  

1) Be a Helper to your Husband.  Ladies, you just can't leave your husband out there to do everything and expect it to be done. That's called selfishness. Being a "helpmeet" to your husband is and still God's way in a marriage. You are his companion and you should show that you will help him be a better man, father, and leader in the way that God intended for him to be. Just think about it. You help him be better.  That's a great feeling because it not only affects him but you and your child(ren) as well. When he's down, help him up. When he can't think of what to say, help him complete his statements. When he can't pray, help him come to so that he can start back praying.

2) Respect your husband. In Ephesians 5: 33, it tells the wife that she must RESPECT her husband. Truth be told, I have not honored this and I will be real about it. There have been times when words and names have come out and let's just say they have not always been so nice.  We both had to go to God and to each other and ask for forgiveness. Easy? NOPE! But it has to be done if you want God to continue to bless your marriage. Respect is not only done inside the house but outside. Especially, outside! That's when others see it.

3) Love on your husband.  Remember your vows? Whether you wrote them or stated the traditional vows. I'm sure we ALL have stated that we will love each other no matter what. Well, that love has to still be there in the really, really bad times. Yes, it's hard to love them when you want to knock their heads off. But, it is something that we must do wives.  It really is not as hard as it seems. 

4) Submit to your husband. Now, I used to think that submitting myself to my husband that I would lose myself and identity. But that is not the case. Yes, the scripture clearly states to submit yourselves to your husband. When you submit, it is helping him fulfill his responsibilities and help him become the man and leader that God created him to be. Submitting to your husband builds oneness within the marriage and it's when both of you come together to fulfill their responsibilities within the marriage to make it work. No pressure. No coercion. Just working together. Trust me, when you two come together, God will bless your marriage like never before. 

Do these with no hesitation and watch how the marriage grows stronger and get better with time.  It won't happen overnight but when the two of you come together, it will happen!

Friday, January 5, 2018

Marriage Evaluation Form

Wait, what? Marriage Evaluation form? Who does that? Why would you that? Where did that come from? Yes, I made it up. Think about it. You have to do an evaluation at work. You do an evaluation card at church. Then why can't it be done in a marriage?  I mean, we all want to grow in the marriage together and make it better.  We all have room for improvement. Well, I know I do.

Each partner will respond to the questions based on experience in the marriage. After completing it, sit down with each other and discuss the answers.  This will open up a great communication outlet for you two.

Click here to review the questions.