Thursday, September 7, 2017

Are You Still Holding His Hands?

Wives, do you remember when you first got married and you and your husband use to hold hands ALL the time? You would even hold hands while dating and it just felt so good because you were connected to your man. The electricity would shoot through your body and at that moment you whispered to yourself "this feels so damn good. This will never end." Holding his hand gives you protection.  Holding his hand gives you confidence. Holding his hand reminds you of the love that you both have for each other. 

But what happens when you stop holding hands? Its been days, weeks, months, even years since the last time you both held each others hand. Work. Children. Sports. Family. Hangouts. Finances. Arguments. Communication level is off balance. So much can happen in a marriage, you become distant to each other. Holding hands with him? Please! I rather watch paint dry. Some wives, feel this way. 

There is still hope. If he doesn't grab your hand, grab his hand. He will probably look at you in shock but hold his hand and hold it tight. Tight to express the love you have for him. Tight so he will know that you are still in this. Tight enough so that he will start holding yours tight. It doesn't take a lot to get things going, you just have to get it going. Pick back up and start back holding his hand. It's worth it! 

Don't allow the bad things to overrule the marriage where you start to think there is no fixing to this so call marriage. There is a way to fix this and pick back up where you both left off at. Pray about. Talk about. Reflect on it. Keep the good going, again. Is it going to be fixed overnight? Hell, no. I mean, Rome wasn't built overnight. But it was built. So, start rebuilding your marriage and yes it can start with, holding hands! 

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

How to Brighten up His day

The smallest things in a marriage can make the biggest impact on the marriage.  Meaning there are small and simple things that you can do to brighten up your spouse's day.  Not only will it make him feel good, but it will have you feeling good as well. I think every woman wants to see their husband happy. 

Here's a small list of things you can do to brighten up his day. 

1) Instead of telling him how much you love him, show it.  Often, we say "I love you" but never show it.  Love is an action word put it to use. 

2) Thank you.  Just that simple, tell him thank you.  A man feels unappreciated because a woman can be intimidating and we can hard to please. Show the man a little appreciation, and it doesn't have to end up with having sex. 

3) Make plans to do something that he enjoys doing.  Find out what he likes to do, if you don't already know (which you should), and do it with him.  Don't complain while doing it.  Don't bring it up later about how you did something that he likes but he never does anything you like.  The defeats the purpose. 

4) Buy him a "just because" gift. It doesn't have to be on his birthday, nor on your anniversary. Just a nice and simple gift and hand it to him.  Handing it to him and letting him know that this is just a little token of love from you, will mean a lot. 

5) Set up the perfect evening for him.  Get out something nice for him to wear. Cook his favorite dinner or go to his favorite restaurant. Send him clues throughout the day letting him know that you have something in extra special for him and that the night, is all about him. 

6) Send him that message telling him that you love him and that you are thankful for him being in your life.  Or write a love note and put it in a place where you know he is going to see it.

7) A kiss. Yes, just that simple. A kiss.  Not just any kiss. But a kiss with meaning in it. So keep those lips moisturized :-) 

Keeping your marriage alive and the love level to the highest peak is what's going to keep it going. Letting them know by your words and action on how you love and appreciate them, goes a long way. 

Monday, July 17, 2017

Stay Encouraged!

Life has a way of shifting things around that sometimes make us feel overwhelmed, uncomfortable, and doubtful. Being a wife, mother, employee, counselor, cook, doctor, cab driver, nurse, and so much more can drive you nuts and have you to think that you are in this thing alone.  I know, it's a lot.  I would not be telling the truth if I said "oh no, it's not a lot. You can handle it!"

When life takes a toll on you mentally and physically, it's hard to stay encouraged.  The days get dark, lonely, and long.  It seems as it won't ever end. We have good days.  We also have bad days. But what do we do? We get back up and keep on going.  We can't just look for others to encourage us, we have to encourage ourselves.  Yeah, I know it's easier than done. But we have to do it! We have our child(ren) that looks up to us. We have our spouses that looks up to us. So, we can do it right? RIGHT!!! 

Steps on How to Stay Encouraged
1) Pray to God and ask Him to give you the strength to keep going. 
2) Tell yourself that YOU CAN DO IT
3) Don't be afraid to ask for help around the house. (Remember you are human not super woman.) 
4) Be Courageous! 
5) Love on yourself. 
6) Take a break. (Don't worry, the world is not going to stop because you are taking a break.) 
7) Take thirty minutes to an hour to yourself everyday to keep yourself balance. 
8) Read and only take in positive information. Feeding your mind, body, and spirit with negative things can allow you to go into a mindset that is not comfortable. 
9) Plan a GNO (Girls Night Out) with your closest friends.  Sometimes talking to others and getting it off your chest, can help. They can be your support team. 
10) If you feel like you are falling off track again, stop, take a breath, and go somewhere where you can relax and clear your head. 

Don't give up! You can do it! 

Remember, you are so much stronger than you think! 

Tuesday, July 4, 2017

Happy 4th of July

Today, we celebrate our nation being adopted into the Declaration of Independence 241 years ago.  Today, we also celebrate a grand time to spend with family and friends over great food, fun, fellowship, and of course FIREWORKS!! 

Happy 4th of July
Be safe! 

Monday, May 29, 2017

15 Texts to Send to your Spouse

If you are the type of wife that wants to text something to your husband throughout the day, but can't think of what to text, maybe these texts will help. You know sometimes we want to say it, but we can't get enough courage up to do so. It can also make the moment at home seeing each other after a long day at work even better. 

Thinking of You: 
  1. Hey there handsome! 
  2. Just thinking about all the great times we have with each other 
  3.  Hope you are having a great day. 
  4.  I love spending time with you. 
  5.  Just wanted to say I love you. 

  1. Hey what's up on you and me tonight?? 
  2. I'm sure you've had a hard day at work, so you get a massage from me tonight. 
  3. Hey, last night was part 1. Tonight, part 2. 
  4. How about a nice bubble bath together tonight? 
  5. Tonight, I want to please you. 

  1. Hey, I'm sorry about what I said last night. 
  2. I'm sorry for making it seems as if I don't support you. 
  3. I'm sorry you are having a bad day at work.  Anything, I can do to help? 
  4. I'm sorry for the way I reacted. That was out of my character. 
  5. I know I don't do everything right, but I'm trying to be the best I can for you. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. 

Saturday, May 20, 2017

Trying to balance...Life!

Wife. Mother. Employer. Entrepreneur. Accountant. Nurse. Therapist. Chef. Maid. Cab driver. Team Mom. Church life. And most of all, being A WOMAN! Life is taking a toll on us and we are trying to balance it all.  Why? Where is the help? Hey, Mr. Spouse, why aren't you helping me? This is hard to do this by myself but we are a team.  I don't remember anyone spelling TEAM with an I.  

We wear so many hats and we try to balance it all. But, it's so HARD!! There are not enough hours in a day to get done everything that needs to get done.  Okay, I have the to-do list. We see the meal planner on the refrigerator for the week, so we know what we are going to eat.  But do we go by that schedule because we have to run around and do so much, by the time we get home, we are worn out. 

So how do we do it? No ones knows but we just do it. Do we really go by a schedule? Yes and no. We just go with the flow.  It's amazing of how the "woman" keeps the house and errands running smooth and never miss a beat. We don't get in the bed until the midnight hour but we get it done. If it was an easy way to be cloned and not get caught doing it, I think we would all do it. It is also great to network with other women that are busy just like you and see how you both can work together to help each other.  Not only does it take a village to raise children, but it takes a community to help and build each other up. 

Balancing life is not easy but I don't think we would trade it for anything else.  BUT, every woman deserves at least one weekend to herself. That's not a lot to ask for. Just a little way to show wife/mom/woman/and all the other titles we hold, a little appreciation.  

So I'm off trying to balance my...LIFE! 

Until next time, 

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Stress vs Balance Survey

I'm stressed to the max and I can't take it anymore.  
My life is so easy and calm, I'm so balanced. 

Sit down with your spouse and take this survey together. At the end, tally up each of your scores and see what level you are at. Talk it over and make it better. 

Strongly Disagree (1)      Disagree (2)     Neither (3)     
Agree(4)     Strongly Agree(5)

1) Before I lay down, I am not pleased with myself because I didn't complete all of my tasks for the day.

2) It is hard to schedule a family outing because my spouse's schedule is always booked with something.

3) I find myself trying to be the "super" person for the family.

4) Every time I try to schedule something for myself, I have to cancel it because I focus on my family.

5) Do you allow your home to be messy because you don't have time to clean up?

6) Does clutter bother you?

7) Do you think you are over stressed or very balanced?

8) Can you write 5 sentences about yourself without adding someone else in the statement?

9) While on vacation, do you think about things back at home?

10) Can you turn off your cell phone, tablet/iPad, or any other mobile electronic device for a day and be satisfied?

Tally up your scores and match with the following:
8 - 15 Way to go! You are doing very well to balance work and family. Keep it going
16-20 Okay, time to check out a few areas in life to manage better and get balanced
21-30 WHOA!!! You are stressing yourself to the MAX. Very important for you and your spouse to sit down and make a plan of how to get back on track.

Good luck!!